tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4982441850010956766.post8676475202141504774..comments2016-09-20T18:35:57.657+01:00Comments on Every Starfish Matters: Signs of attachmentAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15520496269318918677noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4982441850010956766.post-47120418425564767482013-02-21T09:45:28.178+00:002013-02-21T09:45:28.178+00:00Hello :)
It's not insensitive at all, it'...Hello :)<br /><br />It's not insensitive at all, it's a really valid question. People used to think that foster carers should hold back emotionally so that a child "saves" those strong attachments for his forever family, but it's generally agreed now that the stronger and more secure the attachment with the foster carers that the child has, the better, as if they've made those connections once, they can do it again. If those pathways in the brain are never formed, then the child is set up for attachment disorders and emotional difficulties further down the line.<br /><br />There are some really good books on the subject of attachment that I'd recommend you have a look at if you're thinking about fostering. We read "Building the bonds of attachment" by Daniel A. Hughes during our assessment, and have had "Attachment, trauma and resilience" by Kate Cairns recommended to us by another foster carer. The series of books by Cathy Glass are also very good - she's an experienced foster carer who writes under a pseudonym about some of the children she's cared for.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15520496269318918677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4982441850010956766.post-31619028885500839302013-02-21T09:23:53.212+00:002013-02-21T09:23:53.212+00:00I just reread my question - it sounded very cold a...I just reread my question - it sounded very cold and negative, I do hope you don't see it that way - I'm only asking as these are my own worries when thinking about fostering.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4982441850010956766.post-81022735589767989032013-02-21T09:22:09.026+00:002013-02-21T09:22:09.026+00:00I'm not sure if this question is a little intr...I'm not sure if this question is a little intrusive or insensitive, if you think it is, I won't be at all offended if you discard it ... <br /><br />I'm wondering about attachment though. It's often a question that pops in to my mind when considering fostering as an option for my own future. Obviously a part of your 'job' is to encourage it, to help the baby/child learn positive attachment and trust - but what about the fact that no-one knows how long your relationship with this child will last? What will the impact on him be if he learns to trust you and then is taken away from you? Do you feel you naturally hold back a little in giving all of yourself, knowing that one day you might have to say goodbye? <br /><br />I hope all of you are well :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com